I did a lot of things in life that I’m not proud of. I wronged a lot of people when I was still super young, dumb, and immature. I made a lot of silly choices. On top of that, I hurt a lot of people which I could never take back. I always want to get a grip and start a new day with all of those things behind me but, I still feel like… I’m guilty of something and yes, maybe that’s true. Some of the things I did, I can’t make up for it nor can I find those people I’ve wronged just to say that I’m sorry now. The past can haunt us but, I don’t think I should hang on to that anymore. Well, more like, I need to let it go. You know, forgive myself. At least, I’m a much better person now. I’m someone whom I’m proud to be.
I’ve been struggling to connect with people all my life but, it doesn’t make my life empty. I have amazing people who are so understanding and kind. They helped me grow and shape myself into the person that I am today. I have many great memories. I have my own ‘family’. People who accept and love me as who I am. I have people who support. People who will always have my back. I’m not afraid to fall down anymore.
It’s true, I have major depression plus all of my insecurity and anxiety, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be free of it fully. However, I’m willing to work on it and try my best to find my peace and happiness.
There are people out there who will hate it if I’m gone but, that’s not my main reason to continue on. I have to do it for me.
Because I deserve it.
And so are you.