Happy New Year?

2012 – I wish you a happy new year…

Well, my January 1st wasn’t so good. I got an intestine infection. I gotta go to the toilet like 8 times per hour. Too fast, too furious, huh? Yeah… My ‘end of the year’ wasn’t so good either. I got that intestine infection right on that date, December 31st.

That night, the last day of the year, I went with my family to Happy Puppy. My little sister is in a very bad mood because my parents refuse to buy her a new action figure. That makes the atmosphere feels quite hellish. I hate that night. Plus another something happen. That new air horn I bought on December 30, my cousin lost on the street when he tried to use it. Then December 31st passed.

fuck

Do you know about my Christmas Eve and my Christmas? Yeah… That too was a quite ‘not good’ day. I refuse to say it’s a bad day. The usage of the word ‘bad’ is bad. However, it’s a bad day anyway.

I spent Christmas doing nothing. Almost like New Year. But, I’m healthier that day.

So, what happen on January 2nd? Maybe my world is shaken by the earthquake in Japan yesterday (January 1st). My stubborn dad give my little puppy whom still 3 weeks old. That’s 3 weeks YOUNG! Believing that his police friend can take care of that little puppy. It’s a Siberian Husky. I doubt that cop can take care of it but, I choose not to care anymore. Let it be… Let it be…

Another thing… My parents, MY MOTHER, wants to sell my dogs. MY DOGS. Yes… Don’t you hate it… To lose something you care? I’ve been taken care of them for years. Now, my parents want to get rid of ’em. I hate my brother so much because he encourage my parents to sell my dogs.

Ah-another thing just happened right now at 23:10. My little sister just broke my necklace. I bought it with my own money. And she broke it like nothing. And part of it is a gift from my best friend; my one and only best friend. Why did she do that? She want me to take a look at the printer and I refuse. I hate her so much for this. And yes, she’s annoying these days.

Everyone is drawing my hatred… I feel so annoyed. No one can understand, no one TRIES to understand. Everyone is so selfish. I hope I can be more selfish this year. I hope I can be more careless this year, not just act careless but, I want my heart to be more careless to things that’s happening. I want my heart to be blind and my feeling dies along with the dead wind. I want to be happy, just me and my happiness together when everyone is so busy with their own business.

Caring other people will only hurt myself. Having family is only blood attached and each individual selfishness. They search for you only when they need to. Being good is only to let others hurt me. BEing alone in the corner of the room is the warmest part of life. Awake when others are sleeping. Daydreaming when others are paying attention to what’s going on. I want my own world. I miss being alone without anyone to care, without being annoyed, without being hurt.

But, I’m afraid to be alone in this dark and cold world. Happy new year…

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